Monday, April 5, 2010

PSA: Beware of Seed Snatchers


Fellas! Beware of seed snatchers. Have you noticed any desperation in the air lately with these women? Especially the unmarried, unpartnered, childless women circa age 30. As their biological clocks wind down toward menopause and the pressure from family members and friends increases, some women are resorting to a dangerous strategy I call seed snatching.

Many desperate, foolish women are out to intentionally steal men's DNA, our baby batter, father fishies, man milk, jizz, cum, nut, ball butter, sperm and semen from our father fountains. Men, we have often been criticized for gaming women into having sex with us then hitting it and quitting. This to me is a disgusting practice as well (if you saw The Hangover you may understand the underlying meaning there). But seed snatchers have taken it to a whole other level!

Following in the tradition of the Praying Mantis, Black Widow, and the infamous Scorpion these females snatch the males seed then decide that he will be a better meal than a mate. Some human seed snatchers also will kill their mates. Just watch the show Snapped and you will see. But the majority opt for more indirect unscrupulous methods. For example, I know of one seed snatching Scorpio woman who coaxed her man into impregnating her and marrying her under the guise of love everlasting and then once her mission was complete, she tried to set him up to go to federal prison. While he was worrying about a fed case, she made a quick getaway with their child. Another example comes from a female friend of mine who was flirting with the idea of seed snatching. She proposed a strategy of having sex with multiple men in one night so that their would be doubt about paternity and she could go have her baby on her own. Some of these clandestine plots work but many of them do not. So this is a warning to women as well.

First let me say that I know there are women out there who are appalled by this description. Rest assured, I do not intend this to be inclusive of all women. In fact, I am sorry that you fine upstanding women have to even go by the same gender label. However, this message is important for you too. Many of you know some seed snatchers and some seed seekers. If you don't know any, you might need to look in the mirror to find one. Also women, if you have a man you need to know that these women can see that your man is good and they are scheming on a way to get to him.

I have to tell the seed snatching woman that it has been my experience that seed snatchers do not end up getting everything the way they had planned. The ones I know are perpetually dissatisfied and face unrelenting frustration as they try to deal with a baby daddy that has peeped their game. Consider this... Perhaps it is your very desperation that keeps your goal distant.

Men, if you have already been duped, don't let it happen again. Don't let her ongoing schemes become an excuse for not meeting the material and emotional needs of your child. If you have yet to encounter a seed snatcher, just make sure the next time you get down with a woman you wrap it up. But if she's so sweet you can let her lick the wrapper.

I don't want this PSA to fuel mistrust between the genders. There are a lot of upright and trustworthy women and men. But there is a such thing as healthy paranoia. I don't think it is an unrealistic goal to set to say I refuse to have any untimely, unwanted pregnancies in my life. Remember the importance of love and forget about your selfish goals. Be considerate of others needs and feelings, Seed Snatchers. Those of your man and of any potential baby. Wait on God. God is good and good things take time.

J

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